Thursday, 14 February 2013

Day 113: Discomfort about sharing personal information



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be/feel uncomfortable, whenever people share with me information that I perceive/define as personal, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that personal information and problems should be dealt with personally, and that sharing them with another is a sign of weakness, instead of realising that I am participating within apolarity construct, in which I will feel inferior and less than and 'vulnerable' when and as I am sharing my personal information with others, and perceive that they can now somehow use this information against me, and on the flip side I will feel superior and more than and powerful, when other people share their information with me, and will perceive and define this information as power that I can hold over them in order to manipulate them into doing what I want in self-interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that I feel uncomfortable in situations where I share 'personal' information and when it is being shared with me because I perceive and define 'personal' information as a manipulation point, therefore I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define/perceive information that I perceive as personal as a manipulation point that I can use with people, whenever I want them to do something for me in self-interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel uncomfortable in intimate situations where I perceive people to be sharing their personal experiences and information with me, instead of allowing myself tohear them out and put myself in their shoes and direct the situation as myself.

When and as I see myself feeling uncomfortable within intimate situations, where 'personal' experiences and information are being shared with me and where I am sharing my 'personal' information and experiences, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that the discomfort is a consequence of participating within the "knowledge is power" construct, where I have defined 'personal' information as a manipulation tool for gaining power over others, creating 'trust' and 'co-dependency', therefore I release the trigger point of the discomfort with self-forgiveness and direct the situation in breath as myself.

I commit myself to through writing and self-forgiveness stop and remove all points and constructs within which I feel discomfort with others (and myself) in intimate situations, where personal information and experiences are being shared, because I realise and understand that otherwise I am separating myself from myself and all that is here within some judgement towards the situation, thus making myself superior/inferior to it, and am not able to direct it within myself in equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the experiences that are being shared with me by defining them as 'personal', and therefore as a manipulation point, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like there is 'trust' being built in sharing 'personal' information, and then feel responsible to create an 'equilibrium' by reciprocating with the same amount of trust, instead of remaining here in breath and not judging the situation as 'personal'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from an intimate situation and the 'personal' experiences and information that is being shared with me by feeling uncomfortable within it and judgethat information, and then use reciprocation as a diversion point from actually looking at the information that is being shared and directing myself within it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that I must create an equilibrium between me and another that is in an intimate situation sharing their 'personal' experiences and information with me, and create a sense of obligation within myself to reciprocate by sharing some personal experiences and information of my own, instead of realising that I am participating within the construct of knowledge being power that I have allowed to exist within me, where I will want to reciprocate with vulnerability, so that I would show the other person a sign of 'good will' as in "I will share some personal data with you so that you wouldn't think that I will use your personal data against you, because I trust you as much as you trust me", instead of realising that I am doing so, because I fear that otherwise the other people will think and be afraid that I might use the 'personal' information that they shared against them.

When and as I see myself wanting to reciprocate to an intimate situation where 'personal' information and experiences are being shared with me with my own 'personal' information and experiences that I perceive to be of the same/similar magnitude, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that I am participating within a preprogrammed design of "knowledge/information is power", where I will want to ensure the other person that their trust in me is not in vain, where I will be afraid that if I do not do that, the other people will feel vulnerable and inferior and afraid that I will use the information against them, and will thus want to create equilibrium, and on the flip side I will be afraid of sharing my own 'personal' experiences/information because I fear that other people might use it against me. Therefore I release the trigger point of wanting to share myself to create equilibrium with self-forgiveness and direct myself in breath by making myself equal to the information that is being shared.

I commit myself to stopping and removing any and all points and constructs of using information as power, because I realise and understand that this creates inequality as secrecy, secluded grouping and polarity friction within this world.

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