Pages

Tuesday 4 July 2017

My relationship with the word "please"



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry at X, whenever she tells me to do something without saying please.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attach an incredible amount of value to the word "please", and judge/perceive/define people who do not use the word "please" as people without culture, as inferior, as uneducated and unsophisticated, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel superior to people who I perceive do not use the word please in their communication with me when they are asking/telling me to do something.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look down upon people who I don't hear using the word please in communication with other people when telling or asking them to do something.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive/define myself as having more culture, more manners, and therefore as superior because I use the word please in communication with other people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the word please in a derogatory way, where I will pronounce it with a tone of superiority, which I have learned from my aunt, and speak it in a way that shows that I think that I am a better person than the one that I am directing the word at.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the word please in an ordering manner, where I do not in fact ask the other person do to something, but am ordering them to do it by speaking the word in a demanding manner and tone, because I perceive that I have power over them and can afford to use the word please in an ordering tone, so as to strengthen my superiority over them by making myself still appear polite, which I define/perceive as a superior state of being to being impolite, and to at the same time strengthen my perceived power over them with being condescending and patronising.

When and as I see myself wanting to use the word please in order to appear superior to the person I am talking to, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that I am participating in emotional manipulation, I'm trying to subdue the other person, and since I wouldn't want to be treated that way, I commit myself to stopping myself and changing myself in the moment by applying and living understanding, gentleness and care.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to speak the word please angrily, wherever I perceive that I can afford to do so without serious consequences to the relationship with the person I am talking to, as a way of manipulation, to manipulate them with fear, to make them afraid of my anger, so that they would more readily comply with what I am asking of them, not realising and understanding that I am participating in a power play where I am trying to overpower the other person by speaking the word please in an angry tone and manner.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive/define speaking the word please angrily as cool and superior, and perceive it to be a way to strengthen my authority over people.

When and as I see myself wanting to speak the word please angrily, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that I have picked up this behaviour from my father, whom I saw as an authority figure, and started emulating his way of speaking it in order to establish my own authority over people. I also realise and understand that I am with this manner of speaking the word please invoking negative emotions within people about themselves and about myself, which makes it impossible to have cooperation between us, therefore I commit myself to stop and to check my starting point for speaking the word please, am I asking for assistance or am I using it as a way of manipulating others, and to apply and live understanding and cooperation as I align myself to what is best for all.

I commit myself to be/become alert to the way I am speaking the word please, and to remove all energetic ties to the word with which I exert superiority or inferiority, and to learn to use it solely for asking for assistance when I self-honestly need it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior, whenever I use the word please to ask for assistance a person that I in that moment define/perceive as more than myself, and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I am begging them when I use the word please to ask them for something, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel fear, doubt, inferiority, insecurity, to feel less than, and to be afraid of how they will respond, and to feel negative and bad, whenever their response to my please is no.


When and as I see myself feeling inferior, insecure and frightened of/about the answer being no, whenever I use the word please, I stop and I breathe. I commit myself to investigating why I am feeling this way towards the person I am talking to, and aligning myself to become equal in my communication and expression towards them by self-forgiving anything and everything that comes up in that moment.

Monday 3 July 2017

Buying something because I feel sorry for salespeople




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for salespeople, and to think/believe/perceive that they must be suffering tremendously because of having to sell stuff, and to therefore desire to buy the stuff that they are offering me in order to diminish their suffering.

When and as I see myself wanting to buy something solely because I want to diminish the salesperson's suffering, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that I am in that moment compromising myself, therefore I commit myself to realistically and commonsensically assessing whether I really need the product that is being offered to me, or am I wanting to please the salesperson by buying it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive/define selling stuff to people, offering them stuff and getting negative responses as a form of suffering since the times my mother was a book saleswoman, whom I used to feel sorry for and pity her.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for salespeople and pity them for having to be salespeople, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to therefore want to buy their products just to make them feel better about themselves for having made a sale.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel obliged to buy a product that is being offered to me, and responsible for the salesperson's happiness, and to therefore desire to buy their product in order to make them happy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like shit, to feel bad, as a bad person, whenever I do not want to buy a product that is being offered to me, and that I know the salesperson is getting a percentage of, and to within that feel like I am diminishing their ability to survive comfortably in this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad, whenever I am trying to sell something and no one wants to buy it, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project this sadness onto other salespeople, to think/Believe/perceive that they will be sad if I do not buy their product, and to feel responsible for making them sad if/when I do not want to buy the product that they're offering me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, whenever I am being offered a product, which I do not want to buy, imagine the salesperson not meeting their necessary quota for a decent survival, not being able to feed or clothe their children, and to with this imagination persuade and convince myself into buying their product, and to then within that feel like a good person, like I did something good for them, to feel morally superior.

When and as I see myself persuading myself that I should buy an offered product in order to help the salesperson survive and make a living in this world, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that I am participating in moral superiority, that I am not really considering that person, but I am in fact rubbing my own ego by thinking that I am a good person for buying the product, therefore I commit myself to keeping it practical and assess whether I really physically need the product and direct myself accordingly.


I commit myself to being alert, whenever I am being offered a product which I did not ask for or look for myself, and to apply practical common sense when assessing whether I really need or could use the offered product, and to not give in to my desire to be seen as a good person by myself for buying the product and thus helping the salesperson meet their quota, to have a decent survival in this world.