Day 182: Tears of joy

I watched this video about a chicken farmer releasing his chickens from cages and making it possible for them to live as actual chickens. This act of kindness brought tears to my eyes. I have already dealt with my reactions to animals and people being abused, but I had not yet written out my reactions to such acts of kindness, hence the welling up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cry and get entangled into positive feelings and energetic movement within myself, whenever I see acts of kindness that humans do for each other and/or (abused) animals or that animals do to each other or to humans. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define/perceive such acts of kindness as something irregular and extraordinary, and be happy for such acts of kindness in this abusive world, instead of realising and understanding that I am perceiving something that should be normal and generally accepted as superior and more than.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience happiness and joy, whenever I see acts of kindness being done, because I perceive that if someone else does more acts of kindness, then I do not have to worry about the world so much.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to worry and fret about the world and the state it is in, instead of realising and understanding that worrying and fretting is not going to assist this world to manifest a system that is best for all in any way, only the self-directive movement of many individuals will.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive that it is ok to cry for joy, instead of realising and understanding that I am crying for joy because at the source of what I am crying about there is great pain and great abuse.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify abuse in my mind as "not that bad", whenever I see acts of kindness that contradict the abuse, instead of realising and understanding that no abuse whatsoever is acceptable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire to adore and give credit to people who diminish or abolish abuse themselves, instead of simply following their example and standing for the same abolishment of abuse worldwide.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel joy and happiness and other positive energetic feelings, whenever I see that suffering that was there before has been stopped, as an opposite polarity of thesadness and anger I felt when I saw suffering happening.

When and as I see myself becoming positively energetically charged and reacting with positive feelings, whenever I see/perceive the ending of hardship and suffering, I stop and I breathe. I realise and understand that I am participating within my mind and generating thoughts and energetic feelings within myself as the opposite polarity of the sadness and anger and frustration I felt when I saw/perceived suffering occurring, therefore I release the trigger point and thought pattern with self-forgiveness and direct myself in breath towards having no energetic reactions to what I am seeing/perceiving.

I commit myself to identify, stop and remove all positive energetic reactions within myself, because I realise and understand that I need to remove both polarities in order to be clear of any kind of reactions and be able to direct myself towards what is best for all.